I hate moving. Once upon a time, my new year's resolution for 2007 was to stop using "love" and "hate" unless they were truly heartfelt. It didn't last. I speak in hyperbole. It's just what I do. So naturally I use these words constantly (ha, get it?). However, this time I'm saying hate and it's the truth. Sorting through old stuff and getting used to the idea of leaving somewhere comfortable isn't exactly my ideal afternoon, but it had to be done. I don't want to leave my wonderful roommate, but I'm excited to live somewhere new with great girls. I don't want to grow up, but I'm paying rent and starting to commute to and from school which is exciting. I don't want to move because I am the world's laziest person, but I'm ready to be all settled in my new cozy home. I am an emotional paradox. I don't even know if that makes sense.
Finals week is upon us. I feel like it crept out of nowhere. This semester has gone by so quickly! Erin and I reflected last night on the past semester and how much change and growth has happened without us realizing. I'm excited and overjoyed at what the Lord has done in these past few months. Of course there has been some major struggles, but I think the good outweighs the bad. God has continued to prove his faithfulness and love over us. I am blessed to have witnessed this take place in so many lives around me. I am consistently reminded that his plans are far greater and better than anything I could have ever imagined. This semester was nowhere near what I was expecting, and I am so grateful for that! As the year comes to a close, I hope to have more conversations of reflection. I don't think we do that enough. Maybe we should all start acknowledging God's providence over our lives more...lest we forget ;)
Best of luck over finals, friends. You guys are so smart, I know you'll do wonderfully. Yay!
Monday, December 15, 2008
Tuesday, December 9, 2008
Thankful
I can't believe the semester is almost over. So much has happened, in what seems like so little time. I love how the Lord works - It has been so amazing to see all that he has been doing in the lives of people around me, and then reflect back on the things he has been revealing to me as well. I feel like I've learned more about myself in these past few months that I ever have before, and while some of it has been extremely difficult, I have continually sensed God's peace -showing me the way back to him, helping me to rely on his strength instead of my own.
I don't know what else to say - except that I am thankful. I am so blessed by the people God has brought into my life and the relationships I have been able to be a part of. The Lord is so, so good, and I couldn't do life without him. :)
Love, Erin
I don't know what else to say - except that I am thankful. I am so blessed by the people God has brought into my life and the relationships I have been able to be a part of. The Lord is so, so good, and I couldn't do life without him. :)
Love, Erin
Monday, December 1, 2008
Fifteen
Erin and I have bad good days. These days usually consist of us being overtly emotional for no apparent reason at all. These are not always bad emotions. Mostly. On these days, we listen to old boyfriend music and watch the ending scene to Wicker Park. I think listening to this song is going to be added to the weird day list of things to do. Today was one of those days. Erin and I usually have these days together, but I don't know if Erin is having one of these days. Erin- are you having one of those days today? Blah, these days are so weird.
This is usually how I fix these days:
1. Blog for no reason. CHECK.
2. Journal for a lot of reasons. CHECK.
3. Read, read, read the Word. Almost Check. After this, I'm hiding in my bed with my Bible and a pen.
4. PRAY. Good old one-on-one convo time with the only One who understands every random emotion going on. CHECK but definitely not enough tonight. So maybe half a CHECK. Like a CHE.
4. Basically just put life on hold for a moment. I can definitely do that right now. Despite papers and tests and stress and blah...it's on hold. Just for a while. On my way to CHECK.
<3 Han
This is usually how I fix these days:
1. Blog for no reason. CHECK.
2. Journal for a lot of reasons. CHECK.
3. Read, read, read the Word. Almost Check. After this, I'm hiding in my bed with my Bible and a pen.
4. PRAY. Good old one-on-one convo time with the only One who understands every random emotion going on. CHECK but definitely not enough tonight. So maybe half a CHECK. Like a CHE.
4. Basically just put life on hold for a moment. I can definitely do that right now. Despite papers and tests and stress and blah...it's on hold. Just for a while. On my way to CHECK.
<3 Han
Saturday, October 25, 2008
My Unread Books
I'm here visiting my family in the home in which I spent the first 18 years of my life. Each room has its many memories, and I made a number of new memories yesterday and the day before in front of my piano, on the love seat in the living room, and in my sister's old room. They are good memories which I will be fond of for much time to come. And now I'm in my room.
In my room, I have two decently sized bookcases. And though I have ready many of the books filling in the spaces of the cases, I will now confess to you the ones I have not read or at least have not finished. I will begin with the smaller bookcase next to my bed. On that shelf, I have not read:
Maximus the Confessor by St. Maximus, it was supposed to be required for a class but then it wasn't, so I didn't open it until just now to find out that it was written by some guys named St. Maximus, who apparently likes to talk about very spiritual things such as love.
Invitation to a Journey by M. Robert Mulholland Jr., it was required for a class but I never finished it, though the parts I read were an interesting combination of psychology and spirituality.
The Return of the Prodigal Son by Henri Nouwen, I read most all of the book, but there were a few spots that I skimmed so much that maybe I can't count it as reading the whole thing.
Teach Yourself: Brazilian Portuguese, I really wanted to learn the language, but then I just got too busy to keep up with it.
Breaking Through by Francisco Jiménez, I read the first few chapters then lost interest.
Works of Love by Søren Kierkegaard, I can't wait until I have the time and patience to go through this book. The first few pages were so enlightening that I have not picked it up in the past year, like a cow chewing its cud—disgusting, I know, but true.
Wise Blood by Flannery O'Connor, I love Flannery O'Connor's short stories (I have a complete stories of Flannery O'Connor on this shelf too, which I also haven't finished but I think that's okay).
The Turn of the Screw and Daisy Miller by Henry James, I have read Daisy Miller but not The Turn of the Screw yet. I bought this book and Wise Blood in a used book store in Santa Barbara with my friends Andy and Jeremy.
Now moving on to my other shelf:
College Faith 2, Biola sent it to me... never read it.
How to Read the Bible and Enjoy it, I have no idea where I even got this book. Luckily, despite never reading this book, I can still read the Bible and enjoy it.
Devotional Christian Classics, my sister Julie got me this for my 20th birthday. For a few days, I read from the book, but then I just stopped. Now it's sitting here on a bookshelf in a room that people don't often go into.
Dark Night of the Soul by St. John of the Cross, I bought this one along with the one following at Archives Bookstore in Pasadena. It's a great bookstore, but I haven't gotten around to reading this book yet.
Papers and Journals: A Selection by Søren Kierkegaard, I thought I really wanted this book at the time that I bought it, and who knows, maybe some day I will want to read it and be very happy I keep it on a bookshelf I have access to once every few months.
Parables of Kierkegaard by Søren Kierkegaard, I've read part of this and it's interesting. It's full of a lot fables from an extremely intelligent, thoughtfull man. I have these books because for a while I foolishly believed I wanted to be a Kierkegaard scholar not quite knowing anything about him besides his interesting biography.
Lost Virtue of Happiness by J.P. Moreland, I was supposed to read this for a school orientation thing, but, as you can see, I did not.
Becoming Real by Steven James, the guy who is kind of like my second dad gave me this book. He also gave me Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell. I read Velvet Elvis but not this one.
The Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer, my mom recommended this book to me, and it's been sitting on my bookshelf ever since.
That completes the list of books on the two bookshelves in my room that I haven't read/completed. I hope you still like me despite the fact that I own so many books I have yet to read. Maybe you could encourage me to read by joining a book club involving me and some of these books. I would like that very much.
Signing off,
Matt
In my room, I have two decently sized bookcases. And though I have ready many of the books filling in the spaces of the cases, I will now confess to you the ones I have not read or at least have not finished. I will begin with the smaller bookcase next to my bed. On that shelf, I have not read:
Maximus the Confessor by St. Maximus, it was supposed to be required for a class but then it wasn't, so I didn't open it until just now to find out that it was written by some guys named St. Maximus, who apparently likes to talk about very spiritual things such as love.
Invitation to a Journey by M. Robert Mulholland Jr., it was required for a class but I never finished it, though the parts I read were an interesting combination of psychology and spirituality.
The Return of the Prodigal Son by Henri Nouwen, I read most all of the book, but there were a few spots that I skimmed so much that maybe I can't count it as reading the whole thing.
Teach Yourself: Brazilian Portuguese, I really wanted to learn the language, but then I just got too busy to keep up with it.
Breaking Through by Francisco Jiménez, I read the first few chapters then lost interest.
Works of Love by Søren Kierkegaard, I can't wait until I have the time and patience to go through this book. The first few pages were so enlightening that I have not picked it up in the past year, like a cow chewing its cud—disgusting, I know, but true.
Wise Blood by Flannery O'Connor, I love Flannery O'Connor's short stories (I have a complete stories of Flannery O'Connor on this shelf too, which I also haven't finished but I think that's okay).
The Turn of the Screw and Daisy Miller by Henry James, I have read Daisy Miller but not The Turn of the Screw yet. I bought this book and Wise Blood in a used book store in Santa Barbara with my friends Andy and Jeremy.
Now moving on to my other shelf:
College Faith 2, Biola sent it to me... never read it.
How to Read the Bible and Enjoy it, I have no idea where I even got this book. Luckily, despite never reading this book, I can still read the Bible and enjoy it.
Devotional Christian Classics, my sister Julie got me this for my 20th birthday. For a few days, I read from the book, but then I just stopped. Now it's sitting here on a bookshelf in a room that people don't often go into.
Dark Night of the Soul by St. John of the Cross, I bought this one along with the one following at Archives Bookstore in Pasadena. It's a great bookstore, but I haven't gotten around to reading this book yet.
Papers and Journals: A Selection by Søren Kierkegaard, I thought I really wanted this book at the time that I bought it, and who knows, maybe some day I will want to read it and be very happy I keep it on a bookshelf I have access to once every few months.
Parables of Kierkegaard by Søren Kierkegaard, I've read part of this and it's interesting. It's full of a lot fables from an extremely intelligent, thoughtfull man. I have these books because for a while I foolishly believed I wanted to be a Kierkegaard scholar not quite knowing anything about him besides his interesting biography.
Lost Virtue of Happiness by J.P. Moreland, I was supposed to read this for a school orientation thing, but, as you can see, I did not.
Becoming Real by Steven James, the guy who is kind of like my second dad gave me this book. He also gave me Velvet Elvis by Rob Bell. I read Velvet Elvis but not this one.
The Pursuit of God by A.W. Tozer, my mom recommended this book to me, and it's been sitting on my bookshelf ever since.
That completes the list of books on the two bookshelves in my room that I haven't read/completed. I hope you still like me despite the fact that I own so many books I have yet to read. Maybe you could encourage me to read by joining a book club involving me and some of these books. I would like that very much.
Signing off,
Matt
Your Love is Strong
I'm sitting in the boys' room with some of my favorite people in the world. Listening to a little Jon Foreman and sipping on organic coffee. Life is wonderful right now.
...and yet the fact that my midterm is unfinished three days after it was due keeps looming in the back of my mind.
Now I do what I have been doing regarding the midterm situation, push it aside...again and move on with life because it's too wonderful to pass up for homework.
So Torrey Conference has come and gone. It's always so hard for me to sit through those talks with an open heart. We come with so much baggage, so much hurt, so much...crap. Sometimes I feel like those speakers come having studied my life and all the stuff that I've hid away. And then I feel like I'm having a one-on-one conversation with these complete strangers. It was good to come to Torrey at a different place than I was two years ago. Sex and the Soul. Basically the same topic that we had our freshman year, but I was in a very different place then than I am now. It was refreshing to come knowing that I've changed a tremendous amount, but at the same time it was challenging to have all these past issues resurface. I guess resurfacing in a good place, in a good way because I've grown but also in a eery way just remembering things that I've moved so far from. If I could go back to 17 year old me, I would grab me by the shoulders and knock some sense into this disillusioned teenage girl...or something.
Erinnnnn- Can I paint your legs with nail polish?
Ok, time for midterm? Maybe not.
-Han
...and yet the fact that my midterm is unfinished three days after it was due keeps looming in the back of my mind.
Now I do what I have been doing regarding the midterm situation, push it aside...again and move on with life because it's too wonderful to pass up for homework.
So Torrey Conference has come and gone. It's always so hard for me to sit through those talks with an open heart. We come with so much baggage, so much hurt, so much...crap. Sometimes I feel like those speakers come having studied my life and all the stuff that I've hid away. And then I feel like I'm having a one-on-one conversation with these complete strangers. It was good to come to Torrey at a different place than I was two years ago. Sex and the Soul. Basically the same topic that we had our freshman year, but I was in a very different place then than I am now. It was refreshing to come knowing that I've changed a tremendous amount, but at the same time it was challenging to have all these past issues resurface. I guess resurfacing in a good place, in a good way because I've grown but also in a eery way just remembering things that I've moved so far from. If I could go back to 17 year old me, I would grab me by the shoulders and knock some sense into this disillusioned teenage girl...or something.
Erinnnnn- Can I paint your legs with nail polish?
Ok, time for midterm? Maybe not.
-Han
Smaller years.
Today I went with Pop to get a haircut.
While we were there, I reflected on the first time my sister and I gave Ethan a haircut. Ethan was probably about two years old, one of the two cutest babies ever. We all sat on the bathroom floor, as my sister attempted to cut Ethan's hair with one our electric buzz haircutters (what are these things really called?). The absolute best part of this particular memory, was when we pulled out all of the nail polish under the sink. We took off the caps and let Ethan paint all over our legs so he wouldn't get scared of the loud buzzing. He couldn't decide if he wanted to pay attention to what was being done to his head as my sister tried to cut his hair, or if he just wanted to enjoy painting all over his mom and aunt. The event ended with Ethan having a good looking haircut, and my sister and I having quite colorful legs.
Kids are so great. I can't wait to hang out with more of them.
<3 Erin
While we were there, I reflected on the first time my sister and I gave Ethan a haircut. Ethan was probably about two years old, one of the two cutest babies ever. We all sat on the bathroom floor, as my sister attempted to cut Ethan's hair with one our electric buzz haircutters (what are these things really called?). The absolute best part of this particular memory, was when we pulled out all of the nail polish under the sink. We took off the caps and let Ethan paint all over our legs so he wouldn't get scared of the loud buzzing. He couldn't decide if he wanted to pay attention to what was being done to his head as my sister tried to cut his hair, or if he just wanted to enjoy painting all over his mom and aunt. The event ended with Ethan having a good looking haircut, and my sister and I having quite colorful legs.
Kids are so great. I can't wait to hang out with more of them.
<3 Erin
Friday, October 24, 2008
Thinking on things present.
The world is so beautiful. I am absolutely thrilled to be alive. God is so good - He is so present.
I have been so blessed by all of the amazing people God has brought into my life...
Words can't clearly express how thankful I am for the love that the Lord has shown me in all areas of my life.
I went home this weekend. Here is the order of events happening after entering my house -
1. Picked up Pop's guitar to begin a new song I thought of during the drive.
2. Ran around the backyard with my hyper dog - her excitement for life really encourages me. :)
3. Waited patiently for my parents to get home from work, so that I could hug them and talk their ears off about all that has been happening.
You know, I really love Biola.
You know, I also really love the people there. I can't imagine going anywhere else for school.
And like Hannah mentioned, I seriously can't believe we have such a short time left.
I can't wait to see all that God is going to do through the people he is building up at Biola. And for the first time in my life, I can't wait to encounter all of the 'unexpected' things I know will be placed in my path over the next few years.
Hey you fo(u)r - I appreciate you all so much. You are all such amazing friends, and I love you dearly.
To anyone else that happens upon this blog, welcome, and I hope you enjoy this glimpse into the lives of Han, Erin, Matt, and Kev.
<3 Erin
I have been so blessed by all of the amazing people God has brought into my life...
Words can't clearly express how thankful I am for the love that the Lord has shown me in all areas of my life.
I went home this weekend. Here is the order of events happening after entering my house -
1. Picked up Pop's guitar to begin a new song I thought of during the drive.
2. Ran around the backyard with my hyper dog - her excitement for life really encourages me. :)
3. Waited patiently for my parents to get home from work, so that I could hug them and talk their ears off about all that has been happening.
You know, I really love Biola.
You know, I also really love the people there. I can't imagine going anywhere else for school.
And like Hannah mentioned, I seriously can't believe we have such a short time left.
I can't wait to see all that God is going to do through the people he is building up at Biola. And for the first time in my life, I can't wait to encounter all of the 'unexpected' things I know will be placed in my path over the next few years.
Hey you fo(u)r - I appreciate you all so much. You are all such amazing friends, and I love you dearly.
To anyone else that happens upon this blog, welcome, and I hope you enjoy this glimpse into the lives of Han, Erin, Matt, and Kev.
<3 Erin
Friday, October 3, 2008
Because being first is cool.
I just have to tell you all that I love you terribly. "You all" being the three and also anyone else that happens to stumble upon this page at some point. I've been so blessed in the past three years at Biola. Yikes. Three years. One left. (Kev, you are the exception here). YIKES.
October 3rd. Bring on the new semester.
-Han
October 3rd. Bring on the new semester.
-Han
Here's the Kick-Off
So here it is. After much anticipation, the glorious birth of our blog. Four friends, a lot of love, and some words. Enjoy.
-Erin, Han, Kev, and Matty B.
-Erin, Han, Kev, and Matty B.
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